It may come as a surprise to you that Sunday, February 13th has been set aside as the National Day of Purity. This little holiday is a very recent invention.
However, I believe it is a great idea to recognize this day, especially in such close proximity to Valentine’s Day. For we know that the best romance is romance done God’s way. And God’s way is the way of sexual purity. I want to take advantage of the opportunity to give some practical encouragement and helps on this timely topic.
There are many Scriptures which speak to the importance of purity, but one of the best and most concise is Hebrews 13:4, “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.”
In a world where things like co-habitation, adultery, homosexuality and the dating culture have blurred Biblical teachings on love and marriage, Hebrews 13:4 provides a very basic, powerful statement for God-honoring purity. This verse covers purity within marriage, by speaking of judgment for the adulterer, and purity outside of marriage, by speaking of God’s judgment on the sexually immoral. Basically, “sexually immoral” renders the Greek word “pornos” which covers any kind of sexual activity outside of the confines of marriage (including homosexuality, pre-marital sex and pornography).
What does it mean to keep the marriage bed pure? Well, it begins with purity of the mind. How are you doing when it comes to guarding that which you allow to enter your mind? We are inundated with so much garbage through media these days. And as they say, garbage in, garbage out. But purity means being careful about what television or movies we consume. Just because a new show looks really good does not mean that it is good for us. It also means having safeguards when it comes to the web. There are some basic rules that help to keep families safe on the web including…
#1 Use a web filter (e.g., Hedgebuilders and Bsecure)
#2 Keep your computer in a public area in your home, especially when it comes to kids
#3 If you have ever struggled with pornography, find accountability partners
I cannot emphasize the importance of accountability enough. (See the resources listed at the end of this blog).
Keeping the marriage bed pure, however, goes beyond the mind to romance and marriage. So much of our culture militates again purity previous to marriage, especially in the dating culture of our youth and single adults. But we must not assume that just because our culture does it a certain way, it is the best way. I firmly believe that God’s way is the best way, and that God’s way would discourage the dating scene so common even among young teens. A great resource for youth or single adults to read in this regard is Josh Harris’ I Kissed Dating Goodbye. Another one I recommend is Choosing God's Best: Wisdom for Lifelong Romance by Dr. Don Raunikar. Personally, I am a strong believer in the value of courtship and emphasizing group dates. We do well to avoid unhealthy amounts of intimate time together between those who are not ready for the marriage commitment, the place where romantic intimacy is meant to be enjoyed.
Regardless, when it comes to romance and marriage, whether you are a parent, a youth or a single adult, do not assume that purity will happen automatically. In our world today, purity requires intentionality and, sometimes, it means sacrificing personal wants and practicing self-control. But, as I already mentioned, I firmly believe that this way is the best way because it is God’s way. Your thoughts?
Resources:
Every Man’s Battle and Every Young Man’s Battle by Arterburn and Stoeker; Every Woman’s Battle and Every Young Woman’s Battle by Ethridge; I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Harris; Choosing God's Best: Wisdom for Lifelong Romance by Dr. Raunikar
For parents: Logged On and Tuned Out by Courtney; Against the Tide by LaHaye; Preparing Your Son for Every Man's Battle by Arterburn and Stoeker.